hello my dears,
i believe the work of dr. shefali tsabary is revolutionary in parenting and developing deep connections within ourselves and with others. add this to your list of must watch, dr. shefali tsabary the awakened self on oprah’s super soul sessions.
dr. shefali’s message takes a great deal of openness and time to process. here are my notes and key takeaways:
- protect our children’s authentic selves
- children are born their true selves until parenting and culture happens
- do, accomplish, be more because who we are is not enough
- leading to a false sense of self with pain and emptiness
- reclaim the choice for our children
- need to give up our delusion of control and superiority of our ego
- parents to heal and children liberated
- parent + child is the foundation for deep connections within ourselves and with others.
we were once that child with grace, wonder, beauty, connection, fully present. then parenting and culture happened, love from fear and ego. we were taught to live outwardly instead of inwardly, sheltered instead of liberated. measured against the checklist of doing, accomplishing, and being more. because who we are was not enough, we start shedding our authentic self. all to make our parents look and feel better about their own insecurities.
teen years frown upon as rebellious and highly emotional because we realize something is not right. pain and emptiness numbed with drugs, food, sex, bullying, violence, etc. living with a false sense of self, we spend midlife searching for ourselves and seeking purpose. it is a vicious cycle when becoming parents ourselves.
do we dare to discover our own delusion and pain?
the first step to reclaiming the choice for our children is to give up our delusion to even think we need to have control. give up our thirst for superiority and longevity of our ego. our children are not the easel to paint the life we never had. they are not puppets for us to fake a false life. emotional wounds spilling out like lava, anywhere they stand, we are wounded, we are triggered. these are beautiful words from dr. shefali.
parents will heal and children liberated. the parent and child relationship is the foundation to deep connections within ourselves and with others.